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Estblezca las Reglas con los Hijos Adultos que Viven en Casa

Set Rules With Adult Children Living at Home

Mario decided to live with his parents while going to community college because they live in the same town as the school. Mario's parents encouraged him to do so because they wanted him to focus on his studies. Their situation is not all that uncommon.

Thirty-six percent of young adults ages 18 to 31 were living with their parents in 2012, up from 34% in 2009 (The Wall Street Journal). Unemployment, the high cost of buying a house or paying rent, and postponing life events such as getting married are factors. If adult children had married, maybe a divorce is why they're moving home.

Whatever the reason, if your children are living at home, consider these ideas to keep the peace, based on the Pew Study, "Why Adult Kids Still Live With Their Parents":

  • Discuss expectations-One reason adult kids don't like to leave is they think mom still will take care of everything she took care of before. Decide up front what kids will be responsible for, for example, doing their own laundry, cooking, and helping with yard work and shopping. Let them know if they'll be required to pay rent or for part of the groceries.
  • Ask about goals and timeframes-Ask about their goals and when they would like to live on their own. Let your kids know how much time you expect them to spend networking, going to school and looking for work/ working. Let them know this is a good time to focus on paying down debt and making timely payments on student loans and other obligations.
  • Set rules for autonomy-Just because they're adults doesn't mean your kids don't have to respect house rules. Ask them to send a text if they won't be home for dinner. Even though they no longer have a curfew, they should be considerate and quiet when they return from an evening out. Parents and offspring alike should show respect by knocking before entering each other's private space.

It would be good for you to decide what you can and cannot afford to do for adult children, maybe by talking to a financial planner. Setting rules as early as possible can help you keep your financial goals and still help your family.

Published 9-16-2013

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